Let me start out by saying I am no expert when it comes to the art of Social Networking. Some people are going on dates weekly with those they meet from their facebook page or blog. They are making money off of clever schemes through acquiring a multitude of “friends.” I am not one of those guys. I am however, an expert on knowing when something annoys me and that happens almost daily when I log on to Twitter, FB or blogspot. I know this is just my 2 cent opinion (that’s about how much its worth) but here is my list of Don’ts. Agree or disagree, I don’t really care.
1. 1. “Why did he/she have to leave me?” I get it. It sucks to get dumped. It feels like your world is crashing down and that you will never love again. We have all been there so what makes you feel like your break up was such a big deal that EVERYONE needed to hear about it? I have broken up with girls since joining “the book” and I have never once felt like it was important enough to fill up someone else’s news feed. I can only think of two reasons why anyone would post something like this. 1. They feel as if this is a last ditch attempt to get him/her back. 2. They want attention. If your reasoning falls under the 1st category then I am going to let you down easy. It won’t work. If you took a survey of couples that have broken up and gotten back together and ask what the determining factor of their reunion was, 0% would say it was due to wall posts on Facebook. If you happen to associate your reasoning with the second option I can’t help you. I don’t relate to people who seek negative attention. I can say however, that is probably a contributing factor as to why you were dumped in the first place (sorry bout it).
2. 2. “Look at me!” You work out. Good for you! I am all for being in shape, I enjoy working out and I try to keep myself looking descent. I appreciate a girl who has a nice figure and I am sure the ladies love a six-pack but why does this mean all of your pictures have to be of you shirtless or in a Bikini? I think that if 30%of your pics or less are of you out on the lake or in a hot tub and you happen to be showing a little skin then fine but if you are over the 50% mark or have an entire album dedicated to you in a swimsuit you are wondering into tool bag territory. Also, you have to realize that at least one or two of your so-called fb “friends” is a fake(you know it’s true), and when I say fake, I mean some 67 year-old sex offender from middle-of no-where Nebraska who’s idea of a fun Tuesday night is looking at pics of you as he parades around cyberspace posing as some Abercrombie model look alike. I don’t know about you but I want to inhibit his ability of picturing or knowing anything about me.
3. 3. “Don’t I have the Cutest Nieces and Nephews?!” I honestly believe that my Nephews and little niece are the cutest kids on earth. I love them and truly believe they could all be in advertisements for GAP Kids. I realized a while back that everyone feels this way about their family so I came up with a new rule. If they aren’t your kids, don’t show them off to the world via the internet. No one cares.
4. 4. “You know what I’m talking about.” You are sharing inside jokes on Facebook where everyone can see it? Really? Unless you are in on the joke no one else thinks it is funny. It is never funny. Going to dinner with people who have inside jokes may be the most annoying thing in the world. What makes you think it is any better to do it online? Let’s reserve those comments for a private text message or your bff sleepover on Friday night.
5. 5. “Location Location Location!” I have a lot of acquaintances who are real estate agents to whom this does not apply but from now on, if I receive a friend request from someone who is trying to sell me a house I am automatically declining. I am not interested in buying a condo in Springville even if it is on a short-sale and has an amazing view.
6. 6. “I am at the store.” I actually kind of like the location app if I am somewhere cool, say a concert or a vacation but what makes you think I needed to know that you were going grocery shopping at Harmon’s in Ft. Union? Come to think of it, let’s take out all meaningless posts. “Bout to hit the gym.” Thanks, for that poignant comment. I’m over surveys too. “Okay ladies, thinking about a new hair color, blonde or brunette?” If they accomplished anything it would tolerable but let’s face it, you don’t want anyone’s opinion. You just want this response, “girl, you look good no matter what!” Its tired to everyone.
My intent in posting this was not to belittle. To tell the truth, I am guilty of a couple of these items. I am not saying this is the way everyone feels either. All I am saying is… You were warned.
